@bullstuff2
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Nolan, my No.1 gson, having Aspergers, has the same approach to others and their sexuality. After he left college and began work, he took a flat and invited another college mate to join him. Sounds OK, yes? Well, the flatmate had gone through a gender change from female and my admirable gson supported him all through that after his divorced mum threw him out. The lad eventually went to live with his dad in another county, but stays in touch. All the birthday and Christmas cards he sends our gson, always carry the message “With lifelong gratitude”.
Gson has always only had myself as a male role model, dad having left when he was a toddler: his mum divorced him many years ago. He feels able to tell me anything as a result, which I see as a great honour. His feelings about a partner and children are the same as yours: he lives his life mostly alone and the family respects that, although we all take time to see him and he comes to every family “do”. He is OK with family and workmates, but strangers are anathema to him. He likes his life like that, he calls us as he needs us and we all understand that. His closest mate is his cousin, our other gson. He is severely dyslexic but intelligent and they get on well together; two ends of the same spectrum.
We humans are a strange species, are we not? I think we are trying to evolve and adapt to this mad world.
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I'm out.VFM, I hope the local thugs in your area are unaware that you have all that cash on your person! I carry very little cash nowadays and my only gamble is the Lottery, online.
I used to play poker and was good at it, won quite a bit in my youth. The one event that stopped me playing happened in Army service: I had just been given a nice slice of back pay after a promotion had gone unrewarded by the Pay Office, due to a posting. I had yet another screaming match with my first missus (I was not the one screaming, couldn’t get a scream in edgeways!) I set off on a bender, wound up in a game with three guys and lost a bomb. Learned the two lessons, 1 – never play when in drink and 2 – realise that losing can happen, no matter how good your game is. I eventually won back all that and more from the same guys, by pretending drunk and having two mystery mates in the next game with me. I never played again.
My dad had a way with horse racing. He and I used to share a week’s betting, by choosing 4 horses on one particular day of the week and picking 6 x 1 shilling doubles. We wrote off 3 shillings each every week, winning only occasionally but good sums when we did win. We took out the stake and half the winnings to make a larger bet the following week, banked the rest. (Or in my case enjoyed what the money could buy!) We also did the Pools between us and almost made the Big One with 23 points, until another guy came up with 24 points. Made us quite a good win and bought me my last Ford Capri: a 1.6 GTXLR that I had been
drooling overlooking at for some time. If I had it now in good condition, it is a classic and worth money. Dad bought mam a beautiful Beaver Lamb coat which she wore all the time. Got too hot in it on Mansfield market, took it off and put it down. Gone in seconds! Always one for the quiet life, he bought her another.When the Thought Police arrive at your door, think -
I'm out.Keith wrote:
” Well on that basis they should let Caster Semenya alone. ” Absolutely agree Keith!
Richard, that was as you might imagine, hard for me to write. I find as I get further into my 8th decade that I am searching the pages of my life and trying to work out what makes me ‘tick’. I have been described as ‘weird’ ‘unusual’ ‘strange’ ‘a one-off’ and memorably by my missus after a few weeks of first meeting: ‘sort of unique’. I just asked her if any of those still fit and she said “All of them and you’re still unique – sort of. There are no other men like you, which IMO is fortunate for all other women.” I’m still trying to decide if that is a compliment or not…
What it all means, and what the crux of your last post means, is that we are all different and we should resist being boxed and labelled.
I once met my large No.2 gson in Grimsby, with several mates. He introduced all 5 of them: 2 girls, 3 boys. One was introduced as “Our gay mate,” without the slightest embarrassment from any of them including the gay girl, who looked the essence of femininity. I shook hands with them all, including the gg. I have a saying, adopted from a gay and mentally-tortured lad I knew some years ago: “Love is where you find it and you have to value it when you do.” That lad took his own life because his dad threw him out when he found out. Nowadays, as with my gson and his friends, the young have a different and better way. I have a lot of time for most young people I meet and I enjoy talking with them, after they get over the shock of some oldphart actually wanting to hear what they have to say. We all travel the same path in the end, it’s just that some of us are closer to the terminus.
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I'm out.I ordered a print cart for my new Canon on Thursday afternoon, from E buyer’s Standard (3-5 Days) delivery. Delivered Friday morning. I am out in the Lincolnshire boondocks, never had E buyer delivery so fast. Excessive Brexit stocking up?
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I'm out.When voting for a Political Party is replaced by voting for a candidate, I will believe that we have democracy.
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I'm out.That is disgusting Dwynne –
Why only 35 bottles per customer?????
(I can drink no more than one a fortnight.)
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I'm out.It’s not as clear cut as you think Steve. This is a feature by Ruth Padawer of the New York Times in 1916, long and involved but well worth a read. I found it 2 years ago when I was looking for something connected with a family issue.*
Female humans have two of the same chromosomes: XX. Males have two different chromosomes: XY. In a foetus, the Y chromosome means it will develop as a male. If there is no Y chromosome, the foetus will be female. Differences and mutations in genes within a chromosome can lead to transgender people. Now that the whole LGBT scenario is out in the open, there are noticeably greater numbers of people born with these differences. They have always been born in similar numbers in the past, but were always suppressed and made to feel shame for their conditions. Still are, in many cultures. It’s why we look at some TV show featuring someone who has had a gender reassignment, and feel uneasy at the sight of a woman with persisting male characteristics, or a man who does not fit the stereotypical male picture of a man.
Nowadays it can appear that the human sexes are merging: it’s a very confusing time, not helped by some of the media, which can twist cases one way or another. There is no simple answer to this.
* The family issue was something that set me researching a few years ago, after conversations with another close relative about my mentally-confused, abusive mother. She was physically stronger and had a deeper voice than most women I knew as a child and was possessed of a savage temper. My dad was absolutely male, but I think he had learned long before I came along, to keep out of the way when she had one of her bad days. The only time he raised his voice to her was after she had hurt me badly and he took me miles away to live with an aunt for a couple of years. She received treatment and when I returned she was milder and medicated, but I never felt anything for her after that. It was the conversation with a close relative which reminded me that mam had returned with a lighter voice. So that explains why I would take an interest in this issue of gender. It is not a black and white thing, it’s actually a confused and confusing thing. For me and my brothers, it caused arguments between us that often turned into fights. Elder brother was always trying to understand and get mother’s love, I had no interest in her at all and could not understand why he kept trying. Middle brother was her favourite in all things and was a target for both of us at separate times, as a result. I wonder how many families have been broken by events like this.
Sad that I get to understand why mother was as she was, when I am only 9 years younger than she was when she passed.
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I'm out.This is the person Steve:
She* is suffering from a condition which gives her* too much male hormone. As a female athlete that gives her what is being viewed as an unfair advantage by the IAAF, the athletics governing body. She is accused by some, of being a man in a woman’s body, but has been examined several times and declared to be completely female.
*I use the female address because she has been medically declared female.
I think Keith started off with the story and then wandered off into a nostalgic, naughty daydream! He said this:
” I bet she is built like a female Hyena down there. ” – because Hyaenas are supposedly Hermaphrodites, with both male and female sexual organs. No, they are not:
But that is just one of the untrue Fake News items about Caster Semanya. The fact is that the athletics establishment don’t know what to do about her, so they have ordered her to take medication which suppresses the testosterone. She refuses to do that and will possibly be prevented from following her career. Many other female athletes are obviously against her performing while harbouring the hormone and refusing to medicate, for obvious reasons: she beats them all. It’s an athletics hot potato.
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I'm out.It’s a simple solution Les and on the face of it, seems a good one. Unfortunately it is simple and you are expecting MP’s to action it: nothing is simple to the simpletons in Westminster. They would immediately look for fifty different ways to complicate it.
The next 12 months are going to be either horrendous for the UK, or the start of something better in our political system. The Establishment is expecting the current state of almost revolution in the country, to die away as it always does. What they are not accounting for, is all the input of young people that is happening at the moment. And the younger they are, the more passionate they are about what is happening to the planet and their future upon it. My 13 yo gdaughter and her peers are really ‘up’ about this and they see Sir David Attenborough as their prophet. No, they have no vote yet, but the half-generation above them do and they are all looking for something better.
The next GE will be interesting, never before have local election upsets had a bearing upon national, it usually calms down into the status quo. I don’t think it will this time: I believe Parliament will be a different place after the next GE. The old ways have to end, our current two-party system is beyond repair and needs replacing with something that works for us all and not just the few. I don’t mean Corbyn’s “For the many not the few” theme song either. His politics are just as jaded and in the past as the Tories’ are. There needs to be a totally representative democracy in this nation.
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I'm out.During my trip to a packed Skeggy on Sunday last, I saw what turned out to be a “date day” turn into a disaster for the male half. I was waiting for my missus to exit the toilet when an attractive woman possibly in her mid-thirties came out, obviously looking for the man who sneaked out from her left and ‘goosed’ her from behind in a very inappropriate manoeuvre. She screamed, whipped around and delivered a mighty slap to this idiot, then told him in no uncertain terms to leave and never bother her again. He left, obviously embarrassed and I hope, ashamed.
My missus had emerged just behind the pair and the lady asked if she would be a witness, should there be any repercussions, probably was thinking in terms of denying the idiot further contact and/or any stalking. Anyway, we both gave her our numbers and agreed to support her if she needed us. She said that she met him online, agreed to a meeting and had been impressed by his life story: how often do we hear that one nowadays?
That was one of those rare Skeggy outings full of incident, usually it’s almost boring.
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I'm out.Just voted. No danger of anyone but our sitting Councillor getting in again.
1 – he is one of only two candidates.
2 – t’other lives in Louth but is an Incomer*. Our bloke is the local farmer I spoke about before.
3 – t’other is Labour and a red rosette around here is an endangered species.
*We have lived here for 19 years and some still see us as Incomers. If they knew my political history they would probably hang me from a lamp post!
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I'm out.BL if you want a “wind down” holiday, take a River Cruise. There is nothing more relaxing than a nice cabin on a good ship, watching the river go by, stopping in a different port every day, travelling overnight. Rhine, Danube, whatever, entertainment every night, great food, good booze. I always wake up as we travel overnight, sit on the balcony with the french windows open. watching the moonlight or starlight on the water as SWMBO snores softly in the comfy bed! Sea cruises are not our thing: thousands of people on a massive ship? No thanks!
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I'm out.Watching the game, I honestly believed for a good while that Liverpool were going to score at least twice. Well I forgot about Messi, the little genius. It will take some doing for Liverpool to score four and keep a clean sheet for the return fixture, but we have seen Liverpool overcome odds before: I don’t think this team knows when it’s beaten.
Now, if only Messi could go down with a short, debilitating illness…
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I'm out.You don’t have to worry about knowing nowt about plants BL: the bloke I spoke about was in the same boat at first. They put him on tills and garden furniture sales, with a couple of hours here and there in the huge plant areas. Now he has learned quite a bit from others and can talk plants with the best of horticulturists.
He loves the open air part, having been an office worker most of his life after being an Army Clerk. Don’t tell Steve, but he comes from the ‘pool and is an Evertonian!
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I'm out.Dwynne, thank you for your post #33014, which was a better explanation of the law and its revised application than any of the efforts in the news media. I get the feeling that you must have been the kind of officer that my old dad called “a proper copper.”
Your last post #33036 points to what I have always thought about British Justice: it is blind, but that does not make it perfect, being subject to human influences and judgement from start to end, however that may turn out. The British people believed for over a century that our police force was eminently trustworthy and (a majority) supported its members without question. For more than 5 decades this reputation has been more and more under threat, until large parts of the populace are able to use the more humane and diverse approach of the force, to defy, abuse and attack officers as they attempt to perform their duties.
Overstretched and under-resourced forces are castigated for not being able to attend some crimes, when the truth is that they must prioritise the calls they get. Living in a very rural county I see this all the time: second largest county in the UK in terms of area, very low density of permanent population but with villages and the few towns spread apart by some distances. Holidaymakers and day trippers from inner cities and large towns invade the county, now for most of the year. Some of these are ‘chancers’ looking to steal and burglarise homes, possibly stealing a car here to take home their loot.
The one thing that really worries – no – frightens me – about law enforcement in this country, is the prospect of a Labour government and Dianne Abbott ? as Home Secretary. ??
There Dwynne: you probably won’t sleep well tonight!
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I'm out.BL, why not try a local Garden Centre? I know a local guy who retired last year and says he loves it. As he was an Estate Agency worker, he admits to struggling at first, but now loves working there and doubles the job up with driving the boss to various farms, market gardens and other suppliers, once or twice a week. Apparently the boss lost his licence to a breathalyser and he wants the guy to carry on driving him when he gets his licence back. The bonus is that the centre does meals and all the staff eat there free.
He is the source of two of my roses. Good chap!
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I'm out.Yes I can understand that BL, but why does every other London team supporter hate Spurs? I always found as a neutral and a Forest supporter, that Arsenal was a rubbish away game. All their fans had this superior attitude, as if the old Highbury was some sort of superior ground to every other stadium on the planet. Upton Park and the Den, I loved, but then I liked the old East End.
QPR brings back a great memory:
Among our crowd that travelled down was a real idiot who just could not keep his lip zipped, especially amongst police escorts. At one League Cup replay, we were streaming down South Africa Road and into the tunnel, with 4 mounted coppers escorting us. The idiot says “That horse is mare.” Copper says “No it’s a Gelding.” “Has to be a mare, there’s a (c***) halfway up it’s back!” The copper made his horse lean its huge backside into the idiot, who spent the game in a police box under the stand and missed Forest thrashing QPR on their own ground. You just cannot afford to have some fans travel with you, they attract trouble.
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I'm out.I had to hit the ranks of the Gone But Not Forgotten in my late Fifties BL, when an old spinal injury almost made me a quadriplegic. I eventually became a self-employed designer/printer, after the worst workplace I ever knew: a County Council Disabled post: that’s even after some Army postings which had some real uniformed pigs. I eventually called it a day when I had made a decent retirement fund out of printing, with the back up of a small HMF pension which has been good for us.
At one point I considered a job at B&Q, but the 40 mile round trip to the Grimsby depot was economically silly, the small Louth store was always fully-staffed and I thought, why deprive someone of a job they need more than I do? Plus we like to get out to beaches and beauty spots whenever we feel like it, accompanied by any grandbrats going spare. Which brings me to a good point: do you have grandchildren? One of the joys of retirement we found when our 4 were young, was borrowing one or two on a School holiday and taking them to the beach for a picnic and a good play. Now even the youngest is too old and has her mates: I miss all that.
Today and in the last few weeks, my health has improved until I can get in the garden. In the last couple of days I have turned over much of it and planted 6 different roses, and I love roses! The real bonus of the garden is that SWMBO’s gardening skills are OK, but totally chaotic: she plants so much stuff in one small area. I have been busily annoying her by
buggeringrectifying her work. It has been an amusing pastime, ??. I have also found the tiny gap where the pesky rabbit gets in to chew our plants, and blocked it up. I had thought of borrowing next door’s daft Jack Russell bitch to catch the little barsteward, but the JR is 15 years old, half deaf and half blind.Whatever you decide to take up your time BL, make it your own. One thing I remember my big bro saying some years ago: it costs you money to go to work. I never understood that until I stopped. You might also find, after a couple of years, that you do not have enough time to do everything you want and you may wonder at the fact that you are busier than you were at work. Wives, I found, have a plan for when you are at home and able to carry out all those jobs that you didn’t know they had been planning. in expectation of your presence at home. I have a mate who rings me a couple of times a month for some “help” that he does not really need. That’s my escape to an hour’s drive and a day out!
Good Luck and Good Health in your retirement.
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I'm out.I have kept this story in my head since I was a teenager, it brings back unwanted memories that always surface every time an ‘under age’ case hits the news.
When I had just reached 16, I met a girl who was so well developed that she could have been taken for the 16 years she herself claimed she was. Raging 16 yo male hormones almost led to disaster for me at a party, until my mate came through the bedroom door and gave me the news that she was, in fact, 13. I left in a hurry, she left the party in tears. It had all been orchestrated by the lad whose house it was and he was older at 19.
Having thought no more about it, I was about to return to sea for my second trip, when I was arrested for sexual assault and almost charged with rape. The girl was so naive that she had let the 19 yo lad talk her into accusing me. Only the evidence of two mates at the party, and the medical evidence that she was still a virgin, saved me. The girl actually broke down and confessed it was all a lie, but I could never blame her too much for it. She was as much a victim as I was, just two kids caught up in something engineered by someone else.
I saw the lass again over the years, as we both went different ways in life. I met her once in Mansfield town centre, with her two children and she tried to apologise for that time. I put her mind at rest, telling her it had not affected me in any way, we were both just too young and in her case much too young. I made her smile and I made her laugh in that conversation: she left I hope with a weight lifted – certainly I did. I have to say that she was still a very attractive woman, and a little voice at the back of my mind was saying “What if…?” But I quietened it and went on my way.
I will always see these cases in the light of someone who could have been jailed for a crime that was punished more severely in 1961 than it is even now. Although I also appreciate that a genuine case of rape is horrible for the victim, especially so if the accused is guilty but will not plead guilty, which results in the victim having to go through the ordeal of the witness box. Cross examination by a determined defence solicitor or barrister, is definitely an ordeal.
I came so close to absolute disaster.
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I'm out.Stick with the day job, Nolan… ??
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